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Saturday, March 05, 2005

 

I am happily being a lazy lazy faster today. I slept until noon. How joyous! Now that I have taken care of a couple of small chores, I am going to lie in bed and read until sunset. My only regret is that it's cold outside; the most satisfying days to be an utter slugabed are when you can open the windows and sip lemonade while turning the pages. On Saturday, July 16th, for example, I will spend the whole day in a state of more or less physical disarray, reading the new Harry Potter book that I will probably have had to punch, kick, and hair-pull my way through a crowd of vicious elementary-school children to get. I fully expect it to me larger than Bartlett's Quotations, too. No matter. There shall be lemonade.

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Thursday, March 03, 2005

 

Oh, I laugh and I laugh and I laugh: My Cat Abraham Lincoln

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For the fasting season, my favorite spiritual-type poem. It's by Roethke, whom no one ever talks about, like "he just wrote garden poems," or whatever. Viva el Roethke!, I say. His poems stick with me. He wavers between a complex doubt backed by complex, technically proficient rhythms and an almost saccharine childlikeness that smacks of outsider art. It beguiles me.


In Evening Air


1
A dark theme keeps me here,
Though summer blazes in the vireo's eye.
Who would be half possessed
By his own nakedness?
Waking's my care --
I'll make a broken music, or I'll die.

2
Ye littles, lie more close!
Make me, O Lord, a last, a simple thing
Time cannot overwhelm.
Once I transcended time :
A bud broke to a rose,
And I rose from a last diminishing.

3
I look down the far light
And I behold the dark side of a tree
Far down a billowing plain,
And when I look again,
It's lost upon the night --
Night I embrace, a dear proximity.

4
I stand by a low fire
Counting the wisps of flame, and I watch how
Light shifts upon the wall.
I bid stillness be still.
I see, in evening air,
How slowly dark comes down on what we do.

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Studiously not writing poetry. I think I poetried myself out, and it's time to let my mind stew for a bit. Time for reinvigoration. But I'm hearing and reading poetry! Attended the first half of the PSA's new poets festival. Twelve poets is a bit of a slog, I must say . . . I was following along nicely right up until about poet eight or nine, and then I found myself staring, gape-mouthed at the weird tiling on the New School's weird Egg-o-Dome Auditorium's ceiling. They made up for it with yummy cheese at the reception. O cheese, my elusive mistress. I heard some new good voices, as well as some good old ones. Met Josh Corey, so now he has a real face, and not just the tiny wee author photo from his book. Going back tonight for more cheese and verse and scribbling nothings in my notebook. In the meantime, I will somnambulate through work.

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Wednesday, March 02, 2005

 

One day of fasting down, eighteen more to go. And the PSA's festival o' poems opens tonight! Huzzah!

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Tuesday, March 01, 2005

 

Last night, seven-thirty. A nor'easter had descended upon New York, and trudging my way past McCarren Park, I had just about succumbed to that dreamy snow-sleep that afflicted pioneers... "I think I'll just lie down in this drift for a while" . . . who would then be found come thaw-time, peaceful as angels and stiffer than boards. However, I stumbled into Pete's Candy Store instead.

There I listened to the works of Sean McNally and Todd Colby. Either of these two men may, in fact, be robots -- vicious cyborgs sent from a dystopian future to destroy humanity before it can flower into an enlightened race. Currently, however, they write and read stories and poems. True, they may be writing and reading them only in the hopes that we will be thereby lulled into a false sense of security, the better to be decimated by our future robot overlords, but considering that I almost fell asleep in a snowdrift, I'm not sure how invested in humanity's future I am, anyway.

Sean McNally led off. He disarmed me by wearing a completely normal suit with a loud tie, instead of a completely wild sportcoat with no tie. He read us the lost eighteen and a half minutes from the Nixon tapes. A few choice fragments: "groovy woman pie" "follow the cadaver to the Fun Fair!" "Checkers is wearing a Nixon suit" "What kind of bear is the Mayor?"

Questions arose: Is Nixon the President? Is he a friend to woodland animals? Is the standard American greeting of "Hello, my name is . . ." about to be supplanted (or has it already been?) by "Look. I don't want any trouble"? Is Nixon the hapless fellow at the Fun Fair, covered in the remains of a vomit pinata? Is his fate to be determined by letter? Or by something else entirely?

We could not be sure, we few snow-braving listeners at Pete's Candy Store. The magisterial ghost of Tricky Dick hung listlessly in the air, making desultory "V is for Victory" hand symbols. Was this the sign of the oncoming robot apocalypse? The haunted assembly did not wait to find out, instead darting furtively to the bar for more drinks.

When we returned, like woodland animals who, previously having been spooked off by a bear or wolf, yet come back for more, they found not Nixon, but . . . a robot! Todd J. Robot! We listened to his tales of robot supremacy, "hot off the robot," as he put it. "Weehauken, that's where they dispose of old robots, right?" He spoke of the anger of old women, and how they mercilessly torment robots. He spoke of the colors of losing and winning, and the robotic discovery thereof. He broke off in his digital misery, unable to continue. He let out a few solitary beeps, a binary wail against the pity of the cosmos. And then he stopped talking about robots entirely.

Then other things were read by Robot Todd, or Person Todd, as he now nefariously tried to be. Only dissection could reveal the truth, and I didn't have the tools. And so I listened to work from his latest book, "Tremble and Shine," which some have called a subtle manual for robot domination, and which Jordan Davis (who advertises his robot allegience brazenly), quoting Andre Breton, an early model robot, says achieves, at times, a convulsive beauty. Todd J. Possibly-A-Robot read about the joy of living beneath a giant flower, about the impending threat to his ability to rock, and about the path of death, aka the boss lady who can't count in Spanish. As I listened, I considered the odds. Was this a human before me? Or had a robot learned human emotion? Or merely its deceptive simulacrum? Should I stop the Philip-K-Dickery, and just listen?

Alas, my ruminations were cut short by the reading's conclusion, and the crowd's subsequent dispersement into the bar for drinks. I bundled myself into my winter garb, took a look at the horizontal advancement of the blowing snow, said my goodbyes, and headed out. I ended my evening with the lovely (and rare for New York) experience of being the first person to deface a large, smooth patch of snow with footprints, as I walked across the park. You sometimes forget that snow is pretty, living here. But you never, ever forget about the robots.

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I feel emotionally fragile and stunted today. I kind of want to hide in a box. On the upside, I had a nice lunch. So I think my mood's improving.

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Monday, February 28, 2005

 

I'm very twitchy today.

I bought a book about pirates. Arrgh! My cultural landscape is littered with stock characters, tropes, like so:

Zombies. Detectives. Vampires. Pirates. Robots. Mobsters. Dinosaurs. Superheroes. Talking Animals. Teenage Romantics. Revolutionaries. Colonists. Aliens. Witches. Evil Italian Aristocrats. Pioneers. Those Stranded on Islands. Maniacs.

Update: I forgot Cowboys! And Pith-Helmeted Explorers!

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