I was waffling uncertainly through yet another sheaf of legal documents when a long-misplaced calendar swanned into view. "What ho, the passage of time!" methought. The place where I am accustomed to spend my daylit hours is unencumbered by time, being a sort of metaphysical deadzone where an unsullied permanence clings: a sort of three-dimensional, five-senses version of white noise.
But time goes on outside these four walls. Until it ends. Which it will. And apparently very soon. Looking upon the calendar, it dawned upon me that a strange confluence of stars has determined that Derby Day and Cinco de Mayo are the same day this year.
This happens from time to time: in 2001, in 1990, in 1984, 1979, 1973, 1962, 1956, and 1934 to be precise. But it's happening more and more: It took over fifty years from the time of the Derby's first running to get to a Cinco de Derby Day. Then another twenty-two. Then, suddenly, eight. Then we cycled back down to eleven, sped up to six, five, six, back down to eleven, and now six again.
The verdict: the universe is fighting a losing battle with some kind of accelerating force. It was somehow staved off a bit in the 90s -- the accelerating force was probably too busy learning how to use the internet and downloading mp3s to keep its attention fully engaged on its dirty business of sewing crazy metaholidays throughout the calendar. And this may only be the beginning...what next? The Boston Marathon was on Tax Day this year, too! Ahhh!
Anyway, I'll return to the Cave That Dwells Outside of Time and start crunching the numbers. Keep your heads down and stay alert for festive convergences. Report these to headquarters by messenger lizard. Use the usual codes, except on second Tuesdays. Good hunting, Americans.
posted by Reen |link| 0 comments
